Monday 3.22.21

❝It comes in waves. Which is nothing new. It just feels surprising at the moment. How quickly we forget our suffering (or maybe it’s just me; I don’t mean to speak for others). Though I guess it’s good to forget the pain and anxiety and depression. The internal chaos. The (rarely understood) tortured indecision paralysis. The explosive angerContinue reading “Monday 3.22.21”

– therapy homework –

We’re all born a relatively blank canvas. As our lives progress, we experience emotions that begin to color who we are. Now, it’s probably different for everybody; colors and what they represent to each individual can be very personal. But I was immediately colored pink with the effusive love of my family. I was coloredContinue reading “– therapy homework –”

from the archives: spilled ink

“Some people write to feel, some people write to heal, some write to remember, some to forget, some people even write to fall in love. I write to make sense of the incomprehensible chaos that saturates every fold and crevice within my brain and permeates through every part of the world outside of it. TheContinue reading “from the archives: spilled ink”

quote collecting + reflecting

i words and quotes and writing them down and having them there and keeping them safe. i think the bio of my instagram includes a self-descriptor of “quote-collector.” what a title, i know. lol but i think where i’m going with this is i’m gonna write down some wordssss i’ve collected recently: every color isContinue reading “quote collecting + reflecting”

I journal obsessively, whenever I can, wherever I can

I basically like, HAVE to. I have to get the words out, the thoughts out, the feelings out in a way that makes some semblance of sense. And the thing is that it’s usually always all confusing and messy, so I have to MAKE it make sense. Straight-up forging meaning out of nothing. Well, notContinue reading “I journal obsessively, whenever I can, wherever I can”

in-between

I don’t know if I’m in a bad mood or not. I feel shitty. Mopey. But not depressed. The super fucking confusing to me. And upsetting. But it’s manageable. But it’s annoying and I don’t like it. But it isn’t paralyzing me. Why is existing still something I have to feel guilty about? I’m confused.Continue reading “in-between”

Emotional Alchemy…?

Today wasn’t a bad day. It just wasn’t good. I barely slept last night and I was anxious and there was nothing to do. The elements of a good day just weren’t there. As I sat at my kitchen table at 4:45 this morning (after I gave up trying to sleep and went ahead andContinue reading “Emotional Alchemy…?”

Today I’m grateful for…

✓ shade from trees that’s tinted orange and gold because autumn has turned the leaves burnt red and yellow, air that’s so crisp it gives you the feeling of biting into a juicy apple, boots and scarves and leather jacket outfits, old cartoons that still make me laugh, an organized bookshelf, beanie hats, that squeakyContinue reading “Today I’m grateful for…”

rainy mondays are for baggy sweatshirts, lots of coffee, and sea shanties/ pirate music playing through my noise cancelling headphones on repeat…while I try to write and actually be productive

yesterday wasn’t TOO unproductive, to be honest. I had a pretty big spurt of energy in the morning where I cleaned as much as I could in as little time as possible. I did the laundry, put things away, wiped the surfaces down, etc. it doesn’t look phenomenal in this apartment, but it’s more livable,Continue reading “rainy mondays are for baggy sweatshirts, lots of coffee, and sea shanties/ pirate music playing through my noise cancelling headphones on repeat…while I try to write and actually be productive”