So I’m taking a class on peer support and how to be an advocate for those who need it

It’s phenomenally interesting. There’s so much to learn about and read about and explore and discuss and ponder deeply. There’s also so much room for personal growth to happen throughout the training process. I was reading about the history of psychiatry and mental health systems and to cut out a lot of wordiness, I foundContinue reading “So I’m taking a class on peer support and how to be an advocate for those who need it”

Words of the Year, 5 months later

I think it was like a few years ago, in early January, I heard about people picking a “word of the year” instead of making New Year resolutions. And this year a blog post by blessingmanifesting reminded me of it. She said to choose a word that embodies how you want to be and thinkContinue reading “Words of the Year, 5 months later”

I’m finding plans/routines really helpful during this (I’m sure I’ve said that before)

1:45pm || It’s been a good day, I guess. I woke up early like normal, did my whole morning routine and made coffee and started my day. I’ve been utilizing technology as best as I can during this craziness. I mean, being isolated is certainly not my favorite thing, but keeping myself accountable is helpful.Continue reading “I’m finding plans/routines really helpful during this (I’m sure I’ve said that before)”

So I found this thing I wrote about eating disorders back in March 2015 at 3am, and it’s applicable now, and I’m sharing it here because I’m proud of my little 23-year-old self :)

Alright, you have an eating disorder? You’re in recovery? Well, listen up, you beautiful fuckers. Here’s some shit I’ve learned: – I’m a beautiful fucking flower, a unique and wonderful snowflake, and my presence is a gift to the freakin’ world. And guess what? You are fucking flowers and snowflakes and crap too. Got it??Continue reading “So I found this thing I wrote about eating disorders back in March 2015 at 3am, and it’s applicable now, and I’m sharing it here because I’m proud of my little 23-year-old self :)”

April 15th and its significance in my recovery

After being in the hospital in February, I’ve realized how weird it is that I remember this specific date and what happened on it 12 years ago. There’s no doubt that experience this February was tremendous; I finally got on a med combo that WORKS to control the raging mood disorder that tornadoed through my twenties andContinue reading “April 15th and its significance in my recovery”

spending my rainy morning staying calm and editing what I’d call “artsy” pics with positive phrases and whatnot

  So yeah. Some positivity for a rainy morning. I’m feeling a little better but still “off,” but maybe that’s just how people feel (no, it definitely isn’t, but maybe this is just how I feel haha…ugh). Either way. While I’m able to, I’m trying to do good things for myself. I’m sitting up straightContinue reading “spending my rainy morning staying calm and editing what I’d call “artsy” pics with positive phrases and whatnot”

I wrote a list a while back about “how to know it’s coming on again” and hoooo boy does it feel accurate…but maybe I’ll think about the opposite now?

To review: How to know it’s coming on again: No matter what song I put on, it doesn’t feel right No matter where I go, it doesn’t feel homey or safe or okay So much dread The fact that I have to get through a whole day (and subsequently a whole night) feels like IContinue reading “I wrote a list a while back about “how to know it’s coming on again” and hoooo boy does it feel accurate…but maybe I’ll think about the opposite now?”

Eating Disorders Awareness Week

It’s a bit early, bc the actual week is at the end of the month. Maybe I’ll have something to say that’s completely different than this rant by that time. But for now, while I feeling like typing this mess, here we go…For the last few years (twelve, I guess? seriously?), eating disorders awareness weekContinue reading “Eating Disorders Awareness Week”

retrospect: how to survive the bad days

The storm has subsided (mostly) I guess it’s like a pendulum. It goes from one extreme to the other, oscillating with all that energy being saved up and used between swings, whizzing by its equilibrium position, giving me whiplash as I try to keep up and get my head on straight. But eventually, the momentum,Continue reading “retrospect: how to survive the bad days”

aftermath.

There’s always a sort of cleanup that needs to be done after an episode, isn’t there? Piles of laundry to do because you’ve neglected them while depressed or manic. Tons of other chores. I guess some people have lots of things to return to various stores when finally thinking clearly enough to regret reckless spending.Continue reading “aftermath.”