Still some fight in me

My car has always been a sort of limbo; I wait here, time passing. I am not patient but still content to stay here listening to classical music (some of which I remember playing, years ago) that reminds me I have a past that was full of pain and torment but also of music andContinue reading “Still some fight in me”

Memes and emotionally significant but potentially bullshit Instagram posts are (apparently) gonna get me through today… one step at a time, I guess?

I’m trying here. Still. Still trying. I’ve heard it said that “it’s okay if all you did today was survive.” Well, I’d love to be productive, but I make no promises, sadly. I don’t even know of anything I can even do that would fall under the category of productive. Whatever. I’m sitting at aContinue reading “Memes and emotionally significant but potentially bullshit Instagram posts are (apparently) gonna get me through today… one step at a time, I guess?”

A poem about my daily life that ends far too optimistically, but whatever…

She woke before seven, excitement abundant, still groggy but ready to thrive. She sprang out of bed (or did something like that); it was morning and she was alive! With a handful of pills and a few sips of water, she began with a plea to stay stable. Then came washing and dressing, while countingContinue reading “A poem about my daily life that ends far too optimistically, but whatever…”

End of my rope, what now?

Here we go again. I barely had the chance to catch my breath but here we fucking go again. It came on quickly, and for no reason, and now I’m trapped in the cage that is my existence with nothing to do but pathetically wait for it to leave me alone…hopefully it eventually will. RageContinue reading “End of my rope, what now?”

What Brings Me Down vs What Fills Me Up

I am 20 years old. I am walking around Stony Brook University, meandering through the buildings, wandering aimlessly across the expansive campus in the pouring rain. I’m drenched from my hair in its high ponytail right down to my purple plaid converse sneakers, but I keep walking. I could be in class; I should beContinue reading “What Brings Me Down vs What Fills Me Up”