Romanticize the shit out of your life, honestly

The Cutting Thing

February 2008: I was home alone, able to relax and not worry about judgmental comments about my eating habits for a few days. It was going to be a welcomed respite. But when the deadlines drew nearer and the clock hands spun too quickly around their center, the all-too-familiar panic began to rise like floodwaters.Continue reading “The Cutting Thing”

So my therapist often asks me to describe my emotions and I’m always just like, uuuhhh anxious? And that’s usually accompanied by me clawing at my chest which is where most of my anxiety sits, because I can’t figure out the right words to explain it (even though words are my fucking thinggg)…so I compiledContinue reading

Rational & Reassuring Thoughts, I Guess?

Guilt is a useless emotion. It has no purpose. Grow from experiences, learn from mistakes, but chances are guilt is not needed in the majority of situations. It just isn’t. Worry is what’s on the other end of the spectrum. It has nothing to do with what’s actually happening right now in reality. Worrying onlyContinue reading “Rational & Reassuring Thoughts, I Guess?”

One hour to getting my shit together (a quick reset)

Sooooo I’m feeling kind of off and pretty overwhelmed. I still have sleep to catch up on (thanks to bipolar-related insomnia and being super busy the last few days) and my boyfriend and I are definitely fighting colds or something. I’m home now, and I wanna reset my brainnnnn so I can focusssss and feelContinue reading “One hour to getting my shit together (a quick reset)”

Medication-related weight gain (or putting on pounds in an unrelated whatever)

I’m tremendously uncomfortable in my body. I feel it underneath my consciousness at all times, physically and emotionally. It sucks. But I’ve been in this disconcerting situation before, and even though it’s laced with inward-pointing disgust, even though it makes my skin crawl, I know what to do (in theory at least). I’m taking discomfortContinue reading “Medication-related weight gain (or putting on pounds in an unrelated whatever)”